Basketball has been a part of me for as long as I can remember. I first started playing around six years old in a rec league at the Moshulu Center by Jerome Ave in the Bronx.
It was a Saturday morning thing, and my dad would always take me. I wasn’t terrific, but I was taller than all of the kids. During one of the games, I got a fast break, and I dunked the ball. Now, we were playing on the baby hoops, but still, it was impressive enough to stop the game for a few seconds.
After that, they moved me up to play with the eight and nine-year-olds, and I struggled. But the coach at the time just told me to play hard. I wish I could remember his name.
I told that story because it ties into a theme of conversations I’ve been having with my players over the last couple of weeks; you need to work hard in everything you do.
The Challenge of Coaching
I’ve always known that I wanted to step into coaching after I was done playing. I was able to get a lot of experience working at Hooperstown in Mount Vernon during my early 20s (shouts to my guys). Unfortunately, it’s no longer around, but coaching various teams allowed me to develop a style that’s a mixture of everything I’ve learned from all of my coaches.
But one thing was always consistent; you have to play hard.
That’s something that I’ve been trying to teach my players the last couple of weeks. I’ve been feeling like the old guru that’s sharing his life experiences. Sometimes they look at me like I’m crazy.
But I’m doing it for their good. It’s not only about putting in effort on the court, but also in life. That’s the message I try to relay. Once they leave the confines of school, real life begins.
You have to be prepared because life does not give a shit if you’re having a terrible day, as we all know. It’s imperative to push through and work hard because you can’t fold.
Now, as they all get older and grow as individuals, they’ll learn how to navigate certain spaces with the required effort. However, for now, my job is to continue cultivating a culture of hard work. There’s been a drop-off somewhere along the line.
Kids and teenagers are mad lazy these days, and I say to myself all the time, “What have you done to be tired?” Sheesh, I sound like my mom. And it’s not a disregard for their mental, physical or emotional state.
But sometimes the quit is there before they even try. That’s what annoys me. There’s this expectation that things will be done for them.
Nope.
I tell them all the time I’m not that far removed from high school. You should see their faces when I say I graduated from Stepinac in 2011. It cracks me up, honestly.
But I want them to understand that I’ve gone through and am still going through situations they will experience later in life. So take these fresh gems now instead of discovering them 20 years later.
A Simple Approach
I found that my best approach is through my real-life experiences. I’m very transparent with my players because, in the business of basketball, there can be a lack of integrity at times, so I’ve vowed always to be honest with them.
One of my favorite stories I told recently was about a game I played with the Westchester Hawks (Shoutout to the whole family). It was one of two moments that changed my basketball career.
And I apologize for the lengthy post if you’re still with me this far. It’s been a few weeks, and I want to get all these thoughts off of my brain. I appreciate you.
So, the game was during Pittsburgh Jam Fest 16U. I was having a shitty game and wasn’t doing much on the court. Then during a timeout, Coach Mark gave me some words that were NSFW.
I wanted to cry, deadass. But I had a decision to make right there and then. Basketball was an essential aspect of my life, and I was trying to get a scholarship. My play didn’t reflect it because I wasn’t putting in any effort on the court.
As soon as I got back in, I took a charge (Thank you, Coach Tim, and your charge drills). I made one of the all-tournament teams as well, which made me happy. If I put in the work, good things will happen.
The second story that changed my perspective with basketball was during a game with Stepinac. We were playing Mount St. Michael. There was a little competitive beef there relating to me at the time, but I’ll save that story for my book.
I relished it, though. Embracing that villain role was fun, but I didn’t control the power well enough. I had a good game, but my energy was all off. I was going back and forth with players, which is something I never really do.
But because it was Mount, I live around the corner, the crowd is talking shit, and we were losing at that point, I felt compelled to act out.
There was one play where I had a wide-open dunk, and I hit the back rim. But while I was hanging, I caught the ball and tried to dunk it again.
CLANG
Missed again.
The crowd starts laughing, and I get a tech.
As I’m walking back to the bench, Coach Tim starts yelling at me. I’m not paying him any mind because I’m focused on what just happened.
But he keeps going. The whole time I was sitting on the bench, he was going at me, challenging my character and seeing if I would respond.
I finally did. I yelled something back to him, and this man shouted “Yes! Finally!!” and put me back in the game. After two trips, I got another wide-open dunk and tried to rip the rim off, even though I was very skinny at the time.
We lost the game in the end, and I cried afterward because I felt like it was my fault. However, a more powerful lesson was to be learned; yes, you’re putting in hard work, but are you doing it for the right reasons?
I was putting in maximum effort in the game, but it was to get back at the players and the crowd. Usually, athletes use heckling to enhance their performance. But that day, it fueled me the wrong way, and I had to check my character.
The Essence of Commitment
At the essence of what you do, there’s a reason for why you want to do it. Whether it’s a hobby, for money, social reasons, etc., you do something for a reason.
That’s what I want my players to understand. And they will, at some point. When you join a team or club, you’re now committed to that group of individuals. So when you come to practice, you have to commit to working hard while also knowing your reason for doing so.
Furthermore, whether they want to or not, life will give them reasons to work hard. So it’s my job to ensure that when I’m done mentoring these individuals, they’ll be disciplined and prepared to handle whatever life has to offer as they continue to get older.
Thank You, Coach
From the bottom of my heart, I want to thank my coaches from adolescence to college. I’m going to use all of the lessons taught to me and mentor the next generation.
I think I can name all of you, but if I forget anyone, it’s all love:
- Coach Berry – Thank you for inspiring me to pursue basketball at age 11
- Coach Ish – RIP, I love you and thank you for your passion.
- Coach Nick – Thank you for believing in my ability at 13 and changing my life.
- Coach Bill – I appreciate how you helped me develop the “street” aspect of my game
- Coach Tony – My first black coach, teaching us that nothing is given and everything is earned. Also, the importance of discipline.
- JD – Thanks for helping me develop my jump shot.
- Tommy Dee – You taught me how to appreciate the history of basketball and changed my love for the game.
- Coach Andrew – For working with me countless times on off days.
- Coach Tim – Your fiery passion for the game; it’s part of how I coach today.
- Coach Kyle – Thank you for helping me enjoy basketball and not put pressure on myself.
- Coach Russo – My guru. Your wisdom and willingness to help me with my free throws are why I don’t miss many today. It’s always you and me in the gym together. I love you.
- Coach Gary, Mark, and Browne (aka Chomps) – All of you were instrumental to my growth as a young black man. You came into my life at a time when I was still trying to figure out my identity, and I honestly can’t thank you enough for how much all of you pushed me and helped me grow. I love y’all.
- Coach Kroogs – Thank you for helping me increase my basketball IQ and skill set. The Melo Spin!
- TJ & Vince – Thank you for showing me how to navigate certain spaces until you get your own.
- Coach Ott – Your enthusiasm and wisdom truly helped throughout my time at Lehigh.
- Coach Reed – Thank you for the opportunity to play at Lehigh and for challenging me mentally.
- Coach Wyche – My other guru. I wouldn’t have gotten through Lehigh without you. Thank you for always being in my corner, showing me the right way, no matter how badly I fucked up. I love and appreciate you.
Thank you.
Sheesh.
That was long. If you’re still here, I really do appreciate you. It’s been a challenging couple of weeks, so it’s been tough trying to find time to write.
But again, we have to take the time and put in the effort for what we say is important to us. And I’ll continue to do my best.
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Have a fantastic Sunday.
Peace and blessings
CB
Conroy's Cosy Corner 