Omni-Potential

Last year, I wrote a post about having ADHD. It was challenging to dive into because it felt like I was coming down on my parents for something that wasn’t their fault. Coming from the Caribbean, Antigua, to be more specific (wah gwan mi people), they had to learn many things on the fly. So naturally, telling me about ADHD probably wasn’t on the top of their to-do list.

Since then, learning about the ins and outs of this condition has been a slow process. But it’s one that I’ve fully embraced because these things indeed take time. I’ve learned some of my triggers; I’ve learned how to control my reactions to certain things (sometimes), and I know how to quell my anxiety when my brain starts catastrophizing. But what I really want to talk about is how I’ve turned ADHD into my superpower.

Learning About My Powers: Boredom

The major thing that I learned about my ADHD throughout this period is that mine is attention-based. So, if something is not of interest to me or I have something else on my mind, I’ll have a hard time completing the task. That’s why it may take me a while to finish certain things. I’ll usually need a catalyst to propel me forward. It sucks, but it’s a part of me that I had to come to terms with.

For example, regarding blog posts, I’ve had a hard time recently sitting down and writing because my focus has been elsewhere. But I also recently learned that boredom is a catalyst for me. No one likes being bored because you sit there twiddling your thumbs. We quell boredom by watching TV, trying to find something to do around the house, or waiting for someone to hit us up with exciting plans. For me, I need to be in a constant state of creativity. So when I’m bored, I write or bake something to pass the time. Even more recently, I’ve started creating things on Canva because seeing the stuff in my brain come to life is dope.

Learning About My Powers: OCD

Another one of my superpowers is OCD (Obsessive-compulsive disorder). Some of you may raise your eyebrows and think, “How Conroy? That sounds like it would be unpleasant.” But the truth is, I don’t have all the symptoms of OCD. The main ones would be:

• Checking things: I like ensuring my apartment is locked when leaving. I’ll walk out of the building, and then two minutes later, I’ll run back inside even though I already know I’ve locked the door. As a result, I sometimes arrive late to wherever I’m going.
• Neutralizing thoughts: One thing about ADHD is that your brain is constantly on the go, so there’s plenty of mental toil throughout the day. Combine that with the repetitive thoughts OCD creates, and I’m cooked by the end of the day.
• Cleaning: I’ve always been a clean person (thanks to my mom), so it’s not alarming for me. However, when it comes to my laundry, I have to ensure it’s done at least every three or four days. I can’t watch the clothes pile up because it makes me feel dirty.

With these in mind, it can be challenging to make it through some days, coupled with my intense coaching schedule. What I’ve learned is that even with a small dose of OCD, I can make it work in my favor.

For example, since I know I’ll always double-check my apartment to ensure it’s locked and appliances are off, I wake up a little earlier to give myself “miscellaneous time.” That way, I can reach my destination on time since I got the double-checking out of the way during the allotted time.

Through meditation and lots of spiritual work, I’ve learned how to change the negative voice in my head and those repetitive thoughts when I hit a rough patch. This has been the toughest challenge because, for most of us, the voices in our heads (if we have one) can be inherently harmful. But one thing I learned in therapy was to sit with those thoughts for a second when they enter your head.

It’s ok to acknowledge that this thought has entered your mind. However, what you do next is equally important. After recognizing the existence of those thoughts, ask yourself if they are true. More times than not, it isn’t, and it’s just our anxiety talking. Once you know it’s not true, quietly visualize a way to get it out of your mind. For me, I use a bus. I put all those negative thoughts on it, and they drive off. They may return, but dismissing them will be less extensive because I know they’re fake.

Learning About My Powers: Addiction

Addiction is one of the main things about ADHD that people don’t talk about because it’s not really in your face as much. However, due to the lack of dopamine in their brain, people with ADHD do things impulsively because they’re seeking a way to feel good. That’s why when a kid repeatedly shows hyperactivity in school, they’re deemed a troublemaker. Could they be? Possibly. But it’s more likely that they’re dealing with ADHD on the hyperactive scale.

For adults, a lack of dopamine can cause them to try and do things to make themselves feel good in not-so-healthy ways, whether it be smoking, drinking, developing bad eating habits, or staying up late. And that leads to harmful, long-term addictions. Researching and coming to terms with the reasons behind certain behaviors will have you floored. But the main thing is to use that new information to figure out how to change your behaviors.

I’ve had those adult-like impulsive behaviors in the past and saw how much it affected me and those around me. So, I consciously decided to find other things that make me feel good. As I mentioned above, I’m now “addicted” to baking. Each week, I try to find something new to bake. Last week, it was cheesecake; I’m still determining what I’ll bake this week. My next goal is to try not to eat everything in three days (lol).

I’m also “addicted” to getting better as a basketball coach. I’m watching something schematic daily, even though I don’t need to. I love basketball that much, even though I’m not playing (trust me, I want to). Furthermore, I’m focused on building Box Out Academy (please follow if you haven’t already – @box_outacademy on IG) because I have a list of things I’m trying to accomplish with it in the future.

This leads me to my last “addiction,” bettering myself overall. I’ve been working on my body over the previous year because I’ve been dealing with some injuries that have taken a toll. But I still have that itch to hoop. As I said to one of my players recently, it’s not that I don’t want to; I can’t be my best self out there on the court. I’ll just set myself back, and I’m tired of doing that. It’s essential to take the time to fix those things so I can flourish when I’m back for my last season. Until then, there are some things I must earn.

Disorders Aren’t Bad

We now live in a society that accepts people who have disorders. I think it’s fantastic that people can get accommodation to help them with their lives because it’s harder for them than for everyone else. One issue in my eyes is that some people are using these disorders to skate through life without putting in any effort to figure out how to maximize its potential. Having a disorder isn’t bad, and it’s not easy having one. But putting in the effort to make it your own rather than letting it consume your life can make a world of difference.

Also, peeps, please remember to subscribe to my blog and follow me on IG @conroycosycorner. The more supporters, the better.

Love and appreciate you all.

Peace and blessings.

CB